sparking blog

i feel like i need to write about this. i don’t yet know what it is but still. it is like a knot trying to rip my belly open. i get cramps if i don’t write. i get a gut punch, irritated, and then mad. to not get mentally violent, i need to write and pour it out. i say i am the one behind my misery with all my expectations but i always said it and meant it in more relation to disappointment. now it suddenly makes itself clear that it is related to keeping yourself from making prophecy guesses and being intentional with your expectations. whatever you keep expecting is your quantum leap.

i looked at the virtual visions closely and said we are going to be something. with no proof, no signal, no nothing, i had the vision. intuition shaped expectations and expectations shaped reality. now you replace the every day stimulants and suddenly i don’t want them at all. not because you are the cure but because there is nothing to be cured anymore. tossing heads right in that part of the song, just like i saw when i had the vision. you just have to shut up and drive and let the road unfold and you just look at your life. look at my life.

no need to make a misery out of every beautiful thing. sometimes it is believing that you deserve the beautiful thing. expect the beautiful thing anyway. and when you don’t even know what to expect, expect the beautiful thing anyway.

and most importantly, keep memoirs of it everywhere. keep the memoirs of every occurring feeling everywhere because it is beautiful. and you will take a look at your life, and you will say, i always had a vision of this. and that is your quantum leap. you expect the best and that is your reality. you expect the most beautiful thing and the most beautiful thing is what you have.

so this time, i won’t say don’t have expectations. this time, instead, i will say, have expectations. have beautiful ones. and don’t forget to look at your life and see how it is filled with beautiful things. and fall in love with your mind.

and i love you. i think we should say it.