sparking blog

songwriting can be the smartest and the most honest tool to express what is going through your mind like pressing the piano keys. it is storytelling, simply put. songwriting is storytelling and if you are writing your own songs you are telling your own story. so many female artists have put their hearts out to their pens along the way, from Stevie Nicks, Patti Smith, Nina Simone, Taylor Swift, SZA, Phoebe Bridgers, Amy Allen, Alicia Keys, Charli XCX, Ariana Grande, Billie Eilish to Olivia Rodrigo. Olivia Rodrigo just released her third studio album at the age of 23, you seem pretty sad for a girl so in love. establishing herself as a talented songwriter when 17 with sour, she now takes it even further as if opening up a window through the best times of your life as a girl, it is when you are 17, when you are in the beginning of your 20s, and then it is forever.

being 23, falling in love, going through a breakup, slowly falling out of love. similarities only differ when compared to the tortured poets department, the album Taylor Swift released when she was 34 years old. both you seem pretty sad for a girl so in love and the tortured poets department being theme albums, we can view from the outside the difference of the tone and intensity of dealing with the same feeling in foundation, when it comes to being in your 20s and being in your 30s. grief starts when in love, so, there is anticipated grief in Olivia Rodrigo’s songwriting and voice in you seem pretty sad for a girl so in love. when you know it is going to end, even the sweetest moment has a sad tone to it, and she put it out really well.

drop dead: track one

drop dead is a great introduction to the first phase, clinging to the person with excitement, not wanting the time spent with them to end, hoping that they never finish that beer, hearing your heart beat with every instance of exploring new sides of who they are. feeling like throwing up, the urge to get to know them more, asking them millions of questions and telling them about yourself. if they kiss you, you may die out of pure excitement. especially the bored in bed, stalking on the internet and immediately having visions of what could be, naming it feminine intuition, a tribute to the moment when you already make it up in your head, write the scenario of your wedding or a first kiss. and can’t ignore the “pisces and a gemini, but i think we might go really nice together” referencing Olivia Rodrigo, a pisces, and Louis Partridge, a gemini.

stupid song: track two

stupid song, teased by her “New York City’s never looked so blue” t-shirt, starts by describing a party where she observes the other girls and notes that her friends are smoking blunts in the bathroom, a flow of events on an already eventful day but then suddenly she shifts to the thought of him, because in that stupid phase of love, even when you are busy with other things, you keep finding yourself thinking of that person and you can’t focus on the day if the day doesn’t include him. even when a lot is going on around you, your mind is only occupied by one thing. getting hit by waves of uninvited feelings when somebody mentions their name, and i want you more than any stupid song could ever say. you feel right, you feel wrong, and you totally feel insane. and if there’s a god he’s the bond that’s between us two. it feels fated. seven nights alone, when he is not with her meals are skipped, days are only stalling until he comes. i’m always ready in case you call. sleeping in her dress and high heels. i dream of you every night, i can’t sleep. let everybody know we are together. the stage of love when you are right on the edge, the moment of your exact falling. there is a mixture of emotions right there. there is right, there is wrong, there is totally insane. there is fear, there is sadness, there is excitement, there is joy.

honeybee: track three

honeybee is the sweetest song written on the album. it so beautifully describes the weight of anticipated grief in love. she says “even when i am quiet, i love you baby, i promise” the first time, but as the song ends she skips the “i love you” and she is quiet and then “i promise“. and you feel your last moments. hoping it doesn’t end, but knowing in your bones it is ending. it hasn’t ended yet, but it is going to end soon and you know it. and you love the way they look at you but you are like a time traveller, you already see the end and the bitter taste is sprinkled on every moment from then on. trying one more time to stay. even when you’re unsure. even when you can’t fully show up. here’s to hoping it gets better. the best part is “everything i own just feels like ours“. what a sweet way to describe the feeling of belonging to someone, the romantic, soul level connection. how she sings honeybee is how it exactly feels. this phase is bittersweet. this is a real love song.

maggots for brains: track four

she is personally so relatable to me in this one, maggots for brains. complaining about how mundane your day was, you tried to write but nothing came out. you drank coffee, it’s the weekend but you are still so bored. you go to a party but you don’t really want to, you feel like a zombie. everything loses meaning. because your mind is elsewhere. but that’s just a thing that happens when my baby goes away. nothing tastes good, going out, being with other people, spending time with friends, they all taste weird. you hear a funny thing and you only think of telling him about it. sometimes you go far and think of asking for a tragedy because you know he would come and take care of you. you are basically not in your body. the days you don’t see him are just stalling until the day you see him again. she got the transition stages and she poured it all out. this is the zombie phase.

u+me=<3: track five

here’s the best phase. everything is pink. hearts are all over the place. you can’t take it slow. wounds are healing, talking on the phone. i hope we stay like this forever. the classic phase where everything feels dreamy. you plus me equals a heart forever. you go to sweet dates, you meet their sister, carve your names, and let’s get married when we’re 25. “and all my ex boyfriends have heard these lines, but i like you better by a million times“. in the beginning of your 20s, every crush feels like forever. all over again and again. and tell me yet again about when we met, what you thought of me. this phase creeps into you all your life, as long as you fall in love again and again. as Taylor Swift also wrote in so high school from the tortured poets department, “tell me about the first time you saw me“. they say modern love’s a cruel endeavor but everything i see is rose colored.

my way: track six

my way totally brings out the side of Olivia that is similar to Paramore or Taylor Swift’s Speak Now era and especially better than revenge. this is a heritage song in her discography. a petty girl to girl feeling you have to admit you feel even though you know it’s wrong. the range of female rage, better than revenge and misery business, and now my way. this is when you have to admit you still have that 17 year-old version of you when you are 23. maybe i’m a petty bitch but you made me resort to this.

the cure: track eight

the cure is probably the most important song on the album. it is the main idea. all the things you expect from that person, the healing you thought would come with them, can’t come with them. and you realize this is where you grow. this is where you know it will never be the cure because it can’t come from outside. “i thought i found the antidote this time“. someone can’t just bring it to you. i got toxins in my bloodstream because it is about me. it comes from within. i need to find the cure within to go outside. because this unreal expectation will only hurt me further. i’m unravelled. you find your head is full of poison and your heart is full of doubt. you find out that you are the one who needs to be the cure, someone else will never be. so, it doesn’t matter how your love feels anymore. the cure is not in your hands anyway. but this hurts me, because now i faced it, i know it can never be enough and i know you can’t just come and stitch me up, i know that i have to do the ugly work now. i have to do the hard thing now, i have to face what is within. if you expect it from the outside, you are preparing yourself for disappointment.

begged: track nine

begged is the phase where the tough realizations coming right after each other. i don’t want it if i have to beg for it. even if it hurts me. all that i want is to know undoubtedly that you just have eyes for me, can you make it clear? feeling like too much with her endless well of needs. you know i could never leave, you know i am devoted, so you don’t worry or do more. i am trying to stick to this thread, not let good love slip away, so i am cool and forgiving, i don’t make it a big deal. but as i play pretend, i know i don’t want it if i have to beg for it. feeling trapped inside your life. it is at a point where it really needs to end. you feel sick. you cling to hope but it doesn’t nourish you at all that you become sick. you are patient, waiting for it to change, he is learning, you give it time, and act like you are not dying. how can you love someone and not tell that they are dying. this is the painful pretending phase.

what’s wrong with me: track ten, with Robert Smith from The Cure

what’s wrong with me tastes amazing as a song. you get The Cure energy straight into the song. i realized a bunch of things, now i am trying to find what’s wrong with me. you are sick from the last phase. you are searching up the symptoms. and you’re what’s wrong with me. Robert Smith sings softly into the “what if this isn’t what i want?“. and that’s the exact time you say is this really what i want? i don’t think so. and you start packing your bags secretly, your escape plan is about to land. but making the move is so hard because you are so sick. say i’m in love, so it’s hard to admit that i can’t eat, i can’t sleep and i think you’re what’s wrong with me.

less: track eleven

in the right moment, less can make you cry. you’re giving up. let’s just go to bed maybe it’ll fix itself tomorrow. you don’t want to try anymore. you say you can’t stand to watch me crying a minute more. if loving me means letting me go and wishing me the best then i guess i wish you loved me less. you try to rebuild it but there is no foundation. you go back to your favorite activities together, you try to push it one more time. but nothing works. magic is gone. grief starts when in love. but you’ve seen me truly happy so you know right now i am not. if loving me means crying at LAX, then i guess i wish you loved me less. nothing meets the expectations. this is the end.

expectations: track twelve

expectations is a great song. hands down. this is an evolved good 4 you and bad idea, right? it is smarter, definitely more fun, and makes you want to dance. you are no longer that easy to impress. i am so evolved now i ask for more. i won’t settle for a guy with a fake job. i used to, but now i take careful consideration. their indecision is painfully unattractive. past mistakes are just new information. after a few experiences, you now how expectations. you are now sure that you are not settling for less. you don’t want to go through those phases again. so it is a fun closure to the journey. the song really makes you dance and celebrate breaking your chains.

witnessing female songwriting from young ages to adulthood is a fascinating experience.